By Iris Kolenich

Many professors at our beloved college have taught for over a decade. Many have great stories of fun happenings in the classrooms or crazy stunts past students would pull. 

However, many times we students see them as just teachers and, when in person, we would walk in, sit down, listen, maybe take a few notes, and leave to do it all over again. In the time of zoom meetings and being online, sometimes even that usual exchange of hellos at the door has ceased to exist. Therefore, today we are going to bring some fun personal memories of professors to you, the students. Particularly excuses they have heard as to why peers could not show up to class, turn in homework, or take a test. Hint hint, don’t use these!

Our first interview came from Professor Donald Tobin who presently teaches computer science at West Virginia Wesleyan College. However, before Wesleyan, he used to teach at Fairmont which is where his greatest excuse came from. Professor Tobin began by saying he was giving a lecture and about 20 minutes in he had three students walk in.  He said to them jokingly, “why are you dragging your rotten carcass in here late to my class?” Tobin in the interview then goes on to say the kids said they were on their way back from Clarksburg and they hit a cat. They saw it was injured and transported the animal to the vet where they waited to see if it would be okay. After receiving good news that the cat would live and be okay, they came back to school. Tobin laughed and the kids sat down. Afterwards they stayed for a minute and apologized for being late and admitted they never hit a cat which Tobin knew because it’s very hard to run over a cat on the road.

Tobin also tells us about when one of his advanced classes used to have to figure out a solution for a coffee shop who was offering free wifi to anyone who bought coffee. The students needed to figure out a way to ensure that those using the wifi had actually bought coffee. When it came time to turn in their solutions Tobin had a kid say they didn’t want to turn it in. It was because if they ever wanted to use it down the street for a business idea they didn’t want anyone else stealing their brilliance. In other words perhaps there wasn’t any work done…

When talking to Professor Tobin, any students within five minutes will hear him discuss how important it is to be able to solve problems. In order to solve problems, honesty is needed. When it comes to homework or school, it is often best to just let the professor know beforehand if you won’t be turning in homework and why. Professor Tobin explains why this is important by stating “If you can’t make a deadline, tell your boss because it is likely that they will need to inform their boss that there was a hold up.” Whether it is because of a party the night before or because a family member passed and you need an extension, treat school as though it is the real world and inform those around you.

Doctor Kimberly Conrad teaches Marketing and Public Relations at Wesleyan. In her interview she was asked about an experience that she shared with a student concerning homework that wasn’t normal and perhaps made her laugh. The first thing that came to mind was when she used to print out the PowerPoints slides for students to use to study and take notes. The night before a test she had a student text her a picture of torn and slobbered pages that used to be PowerPoint slides. She explained that her puppy chewed on them and thought Dr. Conrad may want proof. Professor Conrad explained in the interview that in reality she felt appreciation that the student was comfortable enough to send her that picture and explain what happened.

Next, Conrad went on to tell about a student who said she had to miss class because a tree fell into her bedroom! Buckhannon had a storm the night before which caused this to happen. The next day Conrad said on her way home she happened to pass the student’s house and was shocked, but knew it was true.

Over the years she has had students miss class because their dog had run off about 15-20 minutes till class (especially on test days) which is a bit suspicious. Overall though Dr. Conrad says that most of her students are honest and some even admitted they had gotten too drunk at a party and didn’t study. 

Honesty seems to truly be the best answer when speaking to professors but in general, if you are going to make up an excuse make it a fun and clever one.